Double click to edit
gayweddingessentials©2008
In truth, perceived wedding etiquette for gay weddings is still evolving although flirting with the best man or maid of honour is still a no no. Most of it will have come from the straight world and can be as formal or loose as you want. Older relatives who are still scandalised may be somewhat mollified if the traditions are adhered too. In your relationship, one may feel that they are comfortable in the brides role more than the other. If this is the case then you can arrange your wedding along the strait
wedding format.
wedding format.
Increasingly couples are funding their own nuptials so you and your partner will have some hard talking to do. The fairest way to organise it is to each pay the same percentage of your earnings, that way nobody looses out in real terms. Yes one will end up paying more but in a equitable way.
When it comes to the invitations wedding etiquette, you are entering a minefield of perceived snubs. Who gets in and who is left out will depend on the size of your budget. You have to be ruthless with your lists, immediate family and close friends of course then it starts to get trickier, your boss, other family members, friends and co-workers. Don't forget, couples who have divorced or split up can be problematical.
The wedding etiquette for the best man and maid of honour is not so clear cut, this is going to be a purely personal decision. Guys may have a lesbian friend who would love to be a maid of honour but don't overlook your sister, whilst girls may want a gay friend or brother to be the best man. Some chose the two best men or maids of honour and others drop the whole idea. Your wedding, your rules, but a trusted person who will help with the arrangements is always welcome.
For your big day you will need a couple of trusted friends who can act as ushers to show people to their seats and generally help out. They need to be briefed on seating plans, location of toilets and cloakrooms and know the running order of the festivities.
An important piece of wedding etiquette is tipping, everybody from the priest to the cleaner will want a slice of buckshee so remember to factor this into your budget.
For your big day you will need a couple of trusted friends who can act as ushers to show people to their seats and generally help out. They need to be briefed on seating plans, location of toilets and cloakrooms and know the running order of the festivities.
An important piece of wedding etiquette is tipping, everybody from the priest to the cleaner will want a slice of buckshee so remember to factor this into your budget.
Don't forget to write your thank you letters. So when you are ripping the paper off the gifts remember to keep the card with it so you can mention how wonderful the toast rack is in your reply.
The last piece of wedding etiquette is one that I hope you never need, what to do in the event of delay or cancellation. The delay is not quite as bad, but could mean a lot of juggling to get everything to come together again as suppliers and venues will have bookings that cannot be broken. It may need some phoning to find cancellations. In the meantime you need to notify your guests, starting with those furthest away. If it is possible to have the new date when you contact them, so much the better.
The last piece of wedding etiquette is one that I hope you never need, what to do in the event of delay or cancellation. The delay is not quite as bad, but could mean a lot of juggling to get everything to come together again as suppliers and venues will have bookings that cannot be broken. It may need some phoning to find cancellations. In the meantime you need to notify your guests, starting with those furthest away. If it is possible to have the new date when you contact them, so much the better.
In the event of a cancellation the wedding etiquette is; one of you will have to inform the venues and the suppliers as soon as possible, as well as the guests. At this point in time, you do not need to go into detail but tell them you will ring back later as you have a lot of people to ring. This will give you some time to think. You then need to either return the gifts or refund the money, do this as soon as feasibly possible for your own peace of mind. If you are feeling up to it, go and look for your insurance policy, the money will come in handy for some retail therapy.
Gay Wedding Etiquette For a Gay Wedding In Style
You may wish to host an engagement dinner so that your parents and possibly your immediate families get to meet each other in a relaxed atmosphere.
Do you throw an engagement party or a Wedding shower? Only your credit card knows the answer.
The first thing to consider is who pays for what. Traditionally it was the brides family that paid for the wedding but even in the straight world this is changing. It will, of course depend on how your family has reacted to your civil partnership news. If they are cool, then getting some financial help with the costs will not be a problem, depending on their financial situation.
Do you throw an engagement party or a Wedding shower? Only your credit card knows the answer.
The first thing to consider is who pays for what. Traditionally it was the brides family that paid for the wedding but even in the straight world this is changing. It will, of course depend on how your family has reacted to your civil partnership news. If they are cool, then getting some financial help with the costs will not be a problem, depending on their financial situation.
